Thursday, April 21, 2011

Stupid or Effin? You decide!

In the years we have known her, Loretta has become one of our most beloved Loops Troops. Her sweet, patient manner with customers and generous, kind approach to her coworkers, and her Betty-Crockeresque baking skills, all disguise the secret that lies beneath: a sailor's mouth.

Loretta's northeastern upbringing combined with her more recent years of southern living have given her the ability to smile disarmingly and cuss a blue streak at the same time. She is so soft-spoken and sweet that, rather than shocking gasps, her cussing usually elicits giggle fits.

As one of our two resident webmasters, Loretta has had the chore of picking up newly arrived yarn from the store for photographing and coding to our web store. A full bag of yarn often set off a chain of mumbled curse words from the stockroom. This led one of the Loops Troops to stitch a "special" bag for Loretta. In cute polka-dotted pink bubble letters, it read "Loretta's Effin Bag." Giggles and guffaws ensued.

Fast forward to today. After years of toiling, tweaking and angst-ing, Loretta is ready to debut a masterpiece - this simply brilliant scarf pattern.

The scarf works in multiple gauges, with all kinds of yarns, and is especially pretty in hand-dyed or self-striping yarns with drape - think silk, bamboo, linen and cotton. We love it in Lang Sol de Grade, Louet Linen, and all but the bulkiest of Noro yarns.

She has been testing, tweaking and sample-knitting this scarf for five years. All that time, we've been drooling over it, begging for the pattern, wanting to make it ourselves - but Loretta coyly said "I'm still working on it." At long last, Loretta is ready to debut her new Loops Original pattern. Just one task remains: What to call it? Loretta suggested "Stupid Scarf," because of all the times she promised to get me "that stupid scarf pattern." I suggested "Effin Scarf," for obvious reasons.

Which name would you vote for? Post a comment with your vote, and we'll draw a winner on Monday. The winner will receive a free (as yet un-named) pattern, along with a skein of Noro Taiyo Sock yarn to make the scarf.

Before you vote, watch Loretta's video, here.

Now those comments! And look for the newly-named pattern to be available early next week.

- Shelley
shop online at


Blogger Stacey said...

Stupid scarf!

April 22, 2011 at 5:28 AM  
Blogger Stacey said...

Stupid scarf!

April 22, 2011 at 5:29 AM  
Blogger mkinser said...

Decisions, decisions! Being one who, from time to time, drops the f bomb, I vote Effin.

April 22, 2011 at 5:34 AM  
Anonymous Lisa said...

Effin Scarf

April 22, 2011 at 5:36 AM  
Blogger Jenny Rock said...

Effin scarf. That is too cute to not use

April 22, 2011 at 5:41 AM  
Blogger lance said...

Absolutely...EFFIN Scarf!!!!

April 22, 2011 at 5:48 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Absolutely...EFFIN scarf!!!!

April 22, 2011 at 5:50 AM  
Blogger jennkeehn said...

Effin :)

April 22, 2011 at 5:51 AM  
Blogger dskba said...

How about the stupid Effin scarf????

April 22, 2011 at 5:54 AM  
Blogger Michelle said...

I am all for the effin as well!

April 22, 2011 at 6:00 AM  
Blogger mek said...

I vote Effin, because if you say "Effin" instead of the f-bomb, people may think it is an interesting new foreign word for a scarf, German perhaps. As in, "Ja, das ist mein Effinscarf!"

April 22, 2011 at 6:02 AM  
Blogger teresa said...

I want to make the Stupid scarf from Noro and from cotton and linen!

April 22, 2011 at 6:05 AM  
Anonymous Eunice said...

Please! I can't tell my grandkids I am knitting an effin scarf. (I can hardly write it) I would give it a positive name like joyful scarf.

April 22, 2011 at 6:16 AM  
Blogger Rosann said...

I vote for Effin !!

April 22, 2011 at 6:40 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fantastic scarf! I love all of the different versions! I vote for the "Effin Scarf".


April 22, 2011 at 6:42 AM  
Blogger photoknitgirl said...

I like Effin!

April 22, 2011 at 6:44 AM  
Blogger Robin said...

I like effing scarf

April 22, 2011 at 6:44 AM  
Blogger KatJobson said...

I think the Effin scarf is a cute name, sure to get a giggle when you tell people what you are knitting.

April 22, 2011 at 6:45 AM  
Blogger bapratt said...

I love Loretta and I love that EFFIN' scarf!! <3

April 22, 2011 at 7:00 AM  
Blogger Megan said...

I like Effin!!!

April 22, 2011 at 7:07 AM  
Blogger Susan said...

I love Stupid scarf, because I have used that term for so many of my yarn projects over the years that if somebody really names a real project Stupid Scarf I will have to come up with a new name for my projects!

April 22, 2011 at 7:18 AM  
Blogger Mary Ellen said...

I vote for Stupid Scarf. I loved all versions shown in the video clip.

April 22, 2011 at 7:18 AM  
Blogger Susan said...

Stupid scarf wins hands down! I always use "stupid" when describing a yarn project that I am having trouble figuring out.

April 22, 2011 at 7:20 AM  
Anonymous Ephanie said...

Ohh.. I do like the stupid, Effin scarf. But if we can only pick one, my vote is for Effin' Scarf! Of course, I'll have to make one because of my name. Ephanie's Effin' Scarf!

April 22, 2011 at 7:38 AM  
Blogger DWA @ Studio Z said...

I want to make one for my Mom and one for my Aunt (both minister's wives) so I vote for Stupid Scarf! Otherwise known as Écharpe stupide in French, Stomme sjaal in Dutch, Dummer Schal in German, Sciarpa stupida in Italian, Lenço estúpido in Portuguese and Bufanda estúpida in Spanish (for when Loretta's wonderful scarf goes international)!!!

April 22, 2011 at 7:48 AM  
Blogger dellamae79 said...

I think I'd call it "Patience" since it took her 5 years to complete it!

April 22, 2011 at 7:53 AM  
Blogger dellamae79 said...

I'd call it "Patience" since it took 5 years to finish! Lol

April 22, 2011 at 7:55 AM  
Anonymous Vanessa McLearen said...

Effin is too funny. That's my vote. Love that Loretta!

April 22, 2011 at 7:55 AM  
Blogger Karen said...

Effin Scarf!

April 22, 2011 at 7:58 AM  
Blogger Nancy said...

Well since Beautiful isn't an option I guess I will vote for Stupid. So versatile. Thanks for sharing.

April 22, 2011 at 8:24 AM  
Blogger Stef said...

Effin Scarf! It's hillarious, and appropriate for the situation. You guys come up with the cutest names :)

April 22, 2011 at 8:48 AM  
Blogger AuntSara said...

i vote for effin!

April 22, 2011 at 8:48 AM  
Blogger soccerpickle said...


April 22, 2011 at 9:02 AM  
Blogger Susan said...

I have a different name for the scarf. Being a huge "American Idol" fan, I suggest you name the scarf the "Steven scarf" in honor of Steven Tyler and his colorful comments!

April 22, 2011 at 9:06 AM  
Blogger Shelly said...

It has to be Effin. I want to knit an Effin Scarf!

April 22, 2011 at 9:16 AM  
Blogger labuffalo said...

You girls are to funny!!!! I vote for EFFIN, since I love to use that word!!!!

April 22, 2011 at 9:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Effin for me ,I think it's an appropriate name since it's been 5 years in the making & i'm sure if it was me doing it that long it would be the "effin scarf"

April 22, 2011 at 10:21 AM  
Anonymous Sandy said...

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE that scarf....... That stupid scarf is my choice, though I can certainly appreciate the other option!

April 22, 2011 at 10:25 AM  
OpenID passingdowncrazy said...

Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!

April 22, 2011 at 10:57 AM  
Blogger MJWimbishi said...

Effin... for sure as I know Loretta is not always happy with photographing all the lovely, but "effin" yarn arriving at Loops... thanks Loretta/ MaryJo W

April 22, 2011 at 12:40 PM  
Blogger MJWimbishi said...

I will try again to post.. this evades me, adn I certainly think it should be the EFFIN Scarf - thanks Loretta for all your work with the effin yarn... MaryJo W

April 22, 2011 at 12:41 PM  
Blogger Erica said...

FN scarf

April 22, 2011 at 1:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Love Effin!

Lee Ann

April 22, 2011 at 1:46 PM  
Anonymous Rebecca said...

I liked "Effin" best until I had a "duh" moment and realized what it really meant. "Stupid Scarf" seems a bit more consistent with Loretta's original name, but perhaps "That Stupid Scarf" is the name that the scarf chose for itself.

April 22, 2011 at 2:24 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I vote for summerscape but as it isn't a choice, I'll vote for Stupid Scarf. Looks darling!

April 22, 2011 at 3:13 PM  
Blogger Sarah said...

i like stupid - great scarf!

April 22, 2011 at 4:16 PM  
Blogger terra said...

Hilarious! Loretta, you have kept your swarthy side hidden pretty well, at least from the customers. I would love to make a stupid scarf from your pattern, whatever its name!

April 22, 2011 at 7:40 PM  
Blogger KnittinScarecrow said...

Effin' Scarf

April 22, 2011 at 9:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Cute effin scarf!

April 22, 2011 at 9:46 PM  
Blogger mjknits said...

My vote is definitely for "effin scarf". And yes, I am from the northeast-go Loretta!

April 23, 2011 at 6:40 AM  
Anonymous Laura said...

Effin Scarf. A word I do use from time to time.

April 23, 2011 at 2:00 PM  
Blogger KarenH said...

Stupid Scarf or That Stupid Scarf. :)

April 24, 2011 at 5:27 PM  
Anonymous Sherry said...

I, like a couple of others, like "stupid, effin scarf" but would have to go with "effin" if both adjectives aren't an option.

April 24, 2011 at 5:53 PM  
Blogger Lisette said...

How about...
The Stupid Effin Scarf!

April 24, 2011 at 10:15 PM  
Blogger tinab said...

I vote Effin Scarf! It sort of sounds elfish and it drapes rather as I would think an elf would like. :)

April 25, 2011 at 9:31 AM  
Blogger tinab said...

I like Effin Scarf. It rather sounds elfish or fariyish. With the drapy yarn, too, it would float around the neck as what one would expect an elf/fairy would like.

April 25, 2011 at 9:33 AM  
Anonymous Carolyne said...

I have a whole craft room full of stupid patterns. I think it could use an effin one to go with them.

April 25, 2011 at 9:41 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have a whole craft room full of stupid patterns. I think I would like to have an effin one to go with them

April 25, 2011 at 9:42 AM  
Blogger Shelley Brander said...

tinab, that is so funny! I was in the midst of typing the next post (announcing the winner) and had just finished writing a suggestion about calling it "Elfin" instead - when your comment popped up. Great minds! ;-)

April 25, 2011 at 9:47 AM  

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